A Tough Topic

Liliana has heard the words "die" and "kill" in songs, and at the park. She has asked me a few times over the past few months what the words mean and I had managed to evade the question for a while. I didn't want to talk about such a morbid topic with her and wasn't really quite sure how I was going to explain it. Lately, the question had been coming up more frequently for some reason. When she asked Adam the other day at Easter brunch why he didn't have any grandparents, I tried to skirt the issue by saying they weren't around anymore and tried to distract her by asking about her grandparents. She wasn't falling for it and pushed the issue so I dove right in without having planned what I was going to say at all. I am still not sure the explanation was a good one, but she seems satisfied with the answer and is impressing me with her wisdom.
I told her that Adam had wonderful grandparents when he was younger, but that they got old and died. "What does 'die' mean," she asked. I explained that it meant that people could no longer be here with us on Earth the same way they were when they were living and gave her examples of what I meant. She asked me where they go and I told her that there are a lot of ideas about where people "go" when they die. I told her about the theories of heaven, angels, reincarnation, and eternal rest. As it turns out, she REALLY liked the reincarnation idea and has been talking about it ever since.
It is hard to hear your 3 year old say things like, "when I die I want to be a dolphin! Will you be a dolphin too Mommy?" It makes me tear up. And, I really almost lost it the other day when she asked, "will I die before you or will we always be together?" I managed to hold it together and answer her as best as I could because she is not at all scared or sad when she asks and of course, I don't want her to be. She is really just curious and trying to figure it out. I keep explaining to her that there are so many questions, like hers about death, that nobody really knows the answer to and that it is all about what makes sense to you and what you believe. She told me, "I believe we will always be together and we will be dolphins in the ocean together! And maybe Daddy could be a shark." :) I love her so much. That idea sounds good to me.